Body confidence - I've hit the all time low, again.

I'm not going to sugar coat it, there isn't much need is there? 
I for one know that each individual human battles body confidence at some point in their life and if you have now managed to stand beautifully straight, with your head held high, then I'm going to bow down to you and raise my glass.

Here's a little thing you may not have known about me: I hate my body and have for a ridiculously long time. 
Due to being bullied horribly at a very young age, I have had the misfortune of battling various eating disorders, to the age that I am now. And no, I sadly haven't had any help regarding them.

What made me write down the post is the fact that lately, I have reached a point where I won't let myself buy new clothes, purely because of the fact I know I have gained weight and I will be a bigger size.

I have tried to attack the situation healthily but due to such a negative mind (and no help with my disorder), I can't seem to approach any of the matters properly.

I feel that even though this is my struggle, it is easier to admit to it, then try to force it into something else.

Acknowledge and admission is a step towards recovery. That I truthfully know.

R x